Okay, I admit to having a different name than what I lived with for so many years... so what?

The character below illustrates what I am, and what I do believe as a person. The novels that relate to her life are old now, and this is a fairly modern piece I didn't know about until recently, but... this is how this girl deals with the World.

(Armistead dear friend, I have become what you envisioned for Anna, and yes, you can still peg me!)

TEXT OF "ANNA MADRIGAL REMEMBERS", a stage play 

By Armistead Maupin

Come on in, dear. I'll show you the apartment. Just through the gate and across the garden. And mind the steps on the way up. They're a bit rickety these days -- but, then again, who isn't? I'll be eighty this year, I'm delighted to say, just in time for the millennium.

No -- please don't tell me I don't look it. I want to look it. I want it all to show on my face. Every last goddamn thing. I've lived enough for two people, you see, which is not just a figure of speech. For over half of my life I was -- oh, how can I put this politely? -- a man. And a mess of a man, too. Careless and selfish and full of the cruelty of youth.

What did that boy know?

Nothing at all.

What does the woman know now?

Nothing at all

Except nothing remains.

Nothing endures, not even the pain.

And love is a mad little dance in the rain

To which nothing can ever compare.

Oh, dear, I can see I'm confusing you. Never mind. I'll explain it when you've settled in. Assuming of course that you like the place. We'll have a nice chat and a glass of sherry or smoke something special from the garden. Then, if you like, we can go up on the roof and watch the moon,

Remember what the moon used to be? No, of course you don't, my dear, but I do, I do. When I was a boy, the moon was full of mystery and green cheese, a land for lovers and lunatics, presumed to be more wonderful than anything on earth. And then we went to see for ourselves. And what did we find? A swirl of dust and carbon compounds, a horrid little golf course in Hell. But what would we have done. I wonder, if we'd found a place that was just like this? A moon as blue as a baby's eye with canyons and trees and scarlet butterflies. Would we not have been astonished at the sight?

That's our job, you know: to be astonished. To wake up every morning and see this place anew, as bright and golden the egg in our cup. Our lives are just a flicker in the darkness, and all we ever really have is astonishment and love. Can you do that, my dear? Can you promise to love and be astonished, to taste everything and doubt nothing and cherish every moment as it comes? Tell me yes and the place is yours forever -- no deposit necessary, utilities included. Tell me yes and you're already home.

So what d'ya say? Can we move you in today?

What did that boy know?

Nothing at all?

What does the woman know now?

Nothing at all

Except nothing remains.

Nothing endures, not even the pain

And love is a mad little dance in the rain

To which nothing can ever compare.

Goddess Bless!!!